Birth Plans and Postpartum Talk…

So I was reading this article/blog earlier today written by a lady who just had twins. She talks about how sometimes births don’t go as planned, which can sometimes be true. She then goes on to talk about how after her scheduled cesarean section she had postpartum hemorrhaging. Apparently she had never heard of postpartum hemorrhaging before it happened to her, and that in some cases it does not end as happily. She then says, and I quote “if it had been another era, or another part of the world, I might have been in very big trouble”. She then goes on to thank the team at the hospital and such.

I was actually a little upset with her blog to be honest. I’m not saying that it wasn’t a good blog, or a good topic for that matter. I think it’s very important that women educate themselves about birth and postpartum care, but she just left you hanging. No information, no direction…

We have to educate ourselves! When I was pregnant with my first I read everything I could, I talked to people, and I watched documentaries about pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. I know that we should trust in our doctors and in the healthcare professionals, but sometimes they do things that aren’t in our best interest.

Postpartum hemorrhaging is real, and it can be deadly. Just ask my doula, as she lost a Mother just about two months after I found out I was pregnant with my son. I don’t want to scare you, but I want you to be prepared…so here is a list of things I think are important.

1. Have a birth plan in place. Write it out and go over it with your significant other (SO), your doctor, and anyone else that will be in the delivery room with you. Be sure to have a copy in your hospital bag as well.
2. Have a mediator, or two, or three with you in the delivery room. These people should know your birth plan, and be there to help and try and follow said birth plan. This can include your SO, Mother, sister, best friend, or a doula. I had the same doula at both of my births, and I can not even begin to tell you how invaluable she was!
3. Please, please, please get a hep-lock, also called a saline lock. Even if you don’t plan on getting any fluids or drugs, this little wonder could be all the difference in saving your life. If a problem does arise they can administer drugs and fluids to you right away instead of waiting for them to get an IV going.
4. After delivery see if they can give you a little pitocin. Your probably asking me why…isn’t that for helping woman have contractions during labor. Well if pitocin is given after delivery it speeds up the natural contractions of your uterus, thus minimizing your risk of bleeding.
5. This is the one suggestion that is never fun to talk about, but you need to have a just in case plan in place. If your birth (or postpartum recovery) doesn’t go as planned, you need to have another plan in place. Who will stay with the baby, who will stay with you, how will the baby be cared for if you are being attended to? Maybe you want your SO to stay with you, and Mom to stay with the baby. If you know another Mom that is currently breastfeeding, maybe have their number as an emergency for helping to feed the baby. They could pump and bring milk for the baby, or if you all both okay with it you could have her wet nurse for you. I know these are things we never want to happen, but having a plan in place for just such an emergency is just so important.
6. When in doubt, ask! If you aren’t sure that something is right, or you aren’t sure what to do…ASK! Don’t be afraid to buzz the nurses, because they are there to help you. I had some problems after coming home with my son that caused me to have to call labor and delivery with a follow up question. I had large clots and weird bleeding that I wasn’t sure was normal.

Feel free to read the blog I was speaking about at the beginning of my post, if you would like  http://www.parents.com/blogs/everything-pregnancy/2015/04/08/everything-pregnancy/the-post-birth-complication-i-never-expected/?socsrc=pmmfb1504099

To all you future Dads….

Maybe this is your first baby…or your third, but all you Dads better read this!

Its not easy for us women…this whole baby thing! We have to carry and grow a little person inside us for 36-42 weeks. Sometimes it feels like there is an alien inside us taking over our bodies! We get kicked, punched, morning sickness, morning sickness that lasts all day, sleeplessness, feeling uncomfortable, bloating, and we can even occasionally have an accident.

Then the even more fun part comes…labor and delivery (and sometimes c-sections). We get to go through hours…and sometimes days of labor! The pain can be down right unbearable at times. All we want is for it to hurry up and be over! Then we get to push this wonderful little human out! It can all be rather exhausting!!!

After that is the recovery. Not only do we have this sweet, amazing little baby to take care of, but we also have ourselves to look after and help recover from the birth. There is pain, blood, sore nipples from breastfeeding, more sleeplessness, and dirty diapers.

And there you are Dad, holding your new little one for the first time! Ten tinny fingers…ten tinny toes!!! And you look at your amazing baby’s mom and you start to wonder what you can do to help. Here are some ideas:

• Make sure Mom has everything she needs to recover. This might mean running to the store to buy her some pads, but you will be a hero in her eyes.
• Make sure Mom takes it easy! She needs to rest to make sure she is recovering right, and this goes for both vaginal and c-sections! Help out around the house as much as possible, and it doesn’t hurt to have family come and help as well.
• Food! Help with the cooking, or see if family and friends can take turns dropping off easy to re-heat dishes. Mom’s will also snack a lot and need to drink lots of water, so keep a jug full of water for her and have health snacks within arms reach.
• This is an important time for Mom and baby to bond, but remember you are part of the family! Spend time together as a family starting now! You may feel left out at first, but there are a number of ways for you to include yourself. Snuggle up on the bed together and be a backrest for Mom while she feeds the baby, help change those dirty diapers, hold the baby while Mom goes and takes a shower…
• You might also want to consider getting Mom a push gift. That’s right…it’s an actual thing with an actual name…push gift. Even if she didn’t push the baby out, she still deserves something special! She carried and brought a baby into this world, so get her a little something to let her know how amazing she is. It could get a necklace or a ring…maybe something with the baby’s birthstone in it (I would suggest waiting till the baby is born. If the baby comes early or late it could be born in a different month then the due date month). It doesn’t have to be anything super fancy! If you get something in silver instead of gold it can be a lot cheaper. If you are a little more on the crafty side you could maybe make something like a photo collage or something cute for the baby’s room.

There might be some sleepless nights at first but those first words, those first steps, that first drawing make it more then worth it!!!

Cuddling…101

So with Valentine’s Day coming up in just a few days I thought I would write about cuddling today…

A few weeks ago I read a fact that couples that cuddle can become addicted to each other, and can even go through withdrawal. I read this and immediately thought, “so that’s why I can’t sleep well when my husband has duty or is deployed”. It may seem like such a simple thing, but it has actually been scientifically proven to be true. Scientists discovered that our bodies release the hormone oxytocin when cuddling.

Oxytocin can help boost your immune system, help decrease your pain level, and lower stress. All this also means it lowers your blood pressure, and in affect also lowers your risk of heart disease. So pretty much is it a super drug right?

This naturally occurring drug doesn’t just happen between couples…Oxytocin is also very important to women during childbirth and breastfeeding. Another reason I feel that having the baby placed immediately on the mothers chest after birth is so important. So the skin to skin contact starts the bonding and oxytocin release.

So this Valentine’s Day spend extra time cuddling with the ones you love. For that matter, keep doing it day after day!!! It may be addicting, but now we know it’s a good drug to be addicted to…